A Look In My Mind as I Do My Homework
This is going to be the dialog that is going through my head as I do my homework. I’m going to use AP chemistry homework (convenient since I just started the class and there’s a lot of homework already).
Me: Okay, 26 questions to get done, I can do this. It should take 2 hours, max. Plus, I already read the chapter so I should know what’s going on.
OCD: But do you really know what’s going on? You probably didn’t actually understand it, you should read it all over again slowly.
M: I already read it, I will just reference the textbook as necessary, it’ll be fine.
O: You’re setting yourself up to fail all because you were too lazy to read the textbook.
M: I don’t have time.
O: That is not a good excuse! You MAKE time for the things that are important to you. School and grades are vital to your future. Cutting corners now will result in failing out of high school, and you want to go to college.
M: Well yes, but not reading it a second time shouldn’t result in that, but I’ll skim the main points. Okay, I went over the main points, so time to start. First problem.
O: Oh my gosh!!!!! You don’t know this for sure! You have to go read the book.
M: It seems fairly easy though, and it’s only the first problem.
O: This is AP chemistry! If it’s easy that means you’re doing it wrong. Go check the book, you’re missing something important.
M: Okay, I checked but I didn’t miss anything.
O: Are you sure?
M: Yes I’m sure.
O: 100% sure?
M: Well….no. Time to think through my answer, it has to be good enough.
O: You’re going to do something wrong. Then you’re going to get a bad grade and fail the class, and then fail out of high school.
M: I’ll make it a perfect answer then it’ll be fine and I won’t fail. There, the blank space isn’t filled all the way but it’s answered.
O: No! You’re not done!!! THERE IS BLANK SPACE WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!! YOU’RE GOING TO FAIL!!!!! FIX IT NOW!!!!! YOU DON’T WANT TO LIVE ON THE STREETS AND BE A REJECT FROM SOCIETY!!!! PEOPLE ARE COUNTING ON YOU TO HELP THEM IF THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND AND EVERYONE THINKS YOU’RE SMART AND NOW YOU ARE GOING TO FAIL!!!!!!!!! FIX IT!!!!!!
M: Okay I’ll explain myself more to make sure that it’s perfect and there’s no way I can get it wrong, I don’t want to fail. Now it’s done, the space is basically filled.
O: No!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING! IT COULD BE WRONG! YOU HAVE TO CHECK WITH AT LEAST TWO SMART PEOPLE TO MAKE SURE IT’S RIGHT! YOU ALSO HAVE TO HAVE MORE INFORMATION THAN THEM BECAUSE THEY COULD BE WRONG!
M: I need to keep moving, I’ve spent 20 minutes on one problem. I’ll check my answers once I’m all the way finished.
O: NO!!! YOUR ANSWER IS WRONG!! YOU ARE GOING TO FAIL!!!!!! YOUR LIFE IS OVER!!!!!!!
M: I’m moving on to the next question.
O: NO!!!!! FAILURE!!!!!